Yasmin Bashir

Journal Entries

Editor’s note
This recording was made with a mask on returning home after a run, so somewhat hard to understand. Here’s a facsimile:

Okay, so I’m on the … at the park, I’m coming back from a run, I ran in the park and I’m walking back home and I’m wearing my mask…. And there’s men in cars, people in cars … has got me thinking about how masks, how mask culture is going to affect or disrupt sexual assault or verbal assault. It just has me thinking, like, what is going to become of like… harassment from men… when we’re both wearing masks? And…. Does it make them wearing masks… give them a sense of anonymity and therefore not responsible for their actions if they are unidentifiable like do they then feel more (???) because of that. And, for the person that is being harassed, that is also wearing a mask, are they then just this faceless body to them? Do men think it’s easier to dehumanize and harass disregard women wearing a mask because they do not have to reckon with a person in a body because it is easier to disregard people’s emotion and humanity because half their face is covered? …Harass because it is just this faceless body to them ...they are both wearing masks. Does it then mean that them wearing masks — men think it’s easier to harass them because they’re not wearing a mask?

I know my process is just like too soon to tell or I don’t know. Maybe it’s just not such a huge thing but it’s like I suppose the interactions I’ve had today are not like any I have had at any other time. Men in cars, less people out because there are less people out because of COVID, so it’s actually interesting because it’s usually not in cars and it’s usually in contact with me. Anyway, it’s men in cars and they’re like beeping their horns just like to get my attention and ask me how I’m doing and I’m like clearly not interested and I’m wearing high heels, I have a mask on, they’re in their car. I can’t make it any more clear, I don’t want to fuckin’ talk to you. I mean, I’m clearly not someone who wants to be interacted with. I mean you’re in your car, and I know that someone is honking and … Say “Hey baby how ya’ doin’” or “What’s up” is like seemingly harmless but like so many times … a “Hey baby” or “How ya’ doin’?” has escalated into… with no response…met with “Hey I’m talking to you!” with more ignoring, has escalated into physical violence and, often times, death. So sometimes I have a hard time, like people will say “Is this okay, is someone after you?” Maybe to you that’s not harassment. If I said, “I was harassed today” and someone said “Oh, what happened?” and I said, “Oh someone asked me how I was doing,” that would be kind of ridiculous. That’s not what I’m saying. However, when we are understanding this as a systemic issue, we need to come to terms with the fact that just because physical violence has not been enacted on someone, it’s doesn’t mean that it’s less harmful because you know all too well that will turn into physical violence. Why can’t we just confront it, why do we have to confront it after it happens? Like statistics of people being socially harassed and killed, for it to be valid? I don’t know. I’m just on a walk, bro, walking back from my run, and I was thinking oh look I’m in such a good mood, because I was just thinking. Thinking is actually a disservice to humanity. I think we should end thoughts. They are doing us no good. So, I’m going to turn my brain off for this walk.

I am from Saint Louis, Missouri currently living in Chicago, Illinois. I am interested in spirituality, the body as it relates to black womanhood and feminist theory. I try to investigate these ideas through writing mostly, but I try to extract and understand how they are informed by my daily life, the land I am on, and especially my ancestral history.

Recently I’ve been thinking a lot about my values. What they are, who they serve, what they are rooted in. I used to think I could come to a clearer understanding of who I serve and what my values were through writing. That these answers were hidden somewhere in texts and books or poetry and that my duty was to exhume them. I think now it has become clear to me that these stories or maps of morality and goodness that I am searching for are actually the lives surrounding me. That nurturing and loving my family and community and neighbors is poetry and that is necessary for me to gain a stronger sense of purpose and meaning.

I guess that is what I have been spending my days thinking and writing about. Family and community. Today, though, I am thinking a lot about water. I am currently in Cross Lake, Minnesota. An extremely small town two hours outside of Minneapolis. I’ve been sitting on the doc watching the lake dance and feeling very grateful for water and nature. On the drive up here I saw a sign that said “One Of The Quietest Places On Earth.” A sort of funny claim. It is pretty quiet here though.

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